Every time I do shoot, I worry that my "clients" will discover that I'm actually terrible at this. I felt that way last week when taking pictures for a friend. "Oh God, just act like you know what you're doing. Maybe something will turn out ok. Thank goodness I'm doing this for free, otherwise she would demand that I pay her for wasting her time."
I didn't look at the pictures all week. I dreaded the editing process, convinced that my lack of talent would be extremely obvious.
But it wasn't.
They looked great.
A little crop here, a tiny adjustment to the highlights there, and suddenly three hours had passed. I could have kept editing for another three hours, as I had ended up with so many shots that I'd be proud to share.
I suffer from impostor syndrome. I was convinced that the good shots from my first four photo shoots had been flukes, and eventually I'd end up doing a shoot with nothing to show but apologies. Now, after my fifth session behind the camera, I'm recognizing that I have a style, a good eye for lines and posing, and the ability to ease my friends' nerves while in a vulnerable position (literally). I'm pretty good at post-production too.
I still wouldn't call myself a photographer. Not yet anyway.
But I'm getting pretty good at this.